Why does the thought of asking for what we want keep us from asking for what we want? We know advocating for our career is in our best interest. But, we also fear rejection. There are scientific reasons why the fear of rejection prevents us from taking action. MRI studies have shown the experience of rejection follows a similar neurological pathway as physical pain. We also may equate asking for what we want with the act of speaking up. Many of us are uncomfortable with interjecting and sharing our point of view. I find when I'm thoughtful and clarify information; I can be my best advocate and build emotional resiliency. Here are ways to prepare for asking for what you want:
Clarify goals and expectations.
What are the goals of my boss? My boss’ boss?
Are my goals aligned?
Do I have the budget, training, people to exceed my goals?
Define what you want. Pick a primary and a secondary -
More visibility
Flexibility
Responsibility
Career Development
Special Project
Promotion
Research and be prepared.
Think about what you do and how that matters to the business.
Establish your market value by using tools such as Salary.com and PayScale.com.
Clarify what you need to work on with your manager -
What two things are working well?
What two things would you like to see me do more of?
What (if anything) would you like me to do less of?
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